I think everyone can agree, 2020 was rough. It was rougher more on others than some, but it was definitely rough. There was a collective sigh of relief as the year came to a close, but I think the semi-automatic firearm that was used outside of my backdoor by a reckless neighbor was a bit much. This time, I would have been happy with just a firecracker.
I leave 2020 with scars and battle wounds and a new set of boundaries that are more secure than Fort Knox. I started out the year with one mindset, and left with another. A more eyes wide-open stance. A disbelief, as if I had been slapped by an Avenger after being in a trance from Loki's staff in The Avengers.
I've been hurt by a group of people in ways that may never be able to be repaired. I may be able to forgive one day, but the forgetting may be another thing.
It is interesting how smug and dead set wrong people can be when they judge others on things they see from the outside looking into only a one-sided picture. Oh, that judgment is harsh and brutal. I deleted or used that 30 day mute so many times because of it. And probably should have stayed away from the comment sections of the local news sources on Facebook, as well.
It hurts, really hurts, when people judge with a self-righteous attitude and be so wrong on so many levels. The thing is, it is actually a form of bullying, yet they don't see that. Not in their minds. Not in their eyes. They see themselves as righteous saviors and elitist in their words and marches.
The problem is that right now, despite my being very far from being suicidal, I honestly understand now why people commit suicide during times like these. I understand the hopelessness, the despair, the feelings of just no longer wanting go on. And people who have the heartlessness to post "get a job" over and over are the bullies who might actually pull that trigger. Shame on them. Shame on their lack of apathy, compassion, and ability to maybe step back and stop for once.
Social media has become the bane of our social perspective. Sure, we are able to reconnect and build a connection with people we may never have in the past, but it also allows keyboard warriors to use their words as a weapon of mass destruction. Maybe in 2021, we need to be more mindful of that attitude.
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